Will Williams

I don't know, I don't know how you can make one understand it; what it means to lose someone. If it's not you getting hit but someone you've known. To see them die. There's no way you can explain where they ever accept... I think you'd be in shock initially but you are able to function. You'd still be in that survival mode so you do what you have to do to save your life and the life of the rest of the squad. So you are able to function. I think it hits you more when you are out of that situation, like when you come back to the base and you have the time to reflect. Then it hits you hard. Grieving starts at that time. But I actually do in the event, there's no grieving. You don't have time for it. Your survival don't allow you to do it. It's... really something I can't explain. I don't think anybody can explain what it really, really feels like. At times I feel like it's no feeling, like you're just hollow for a moment. Really painful to be in a close proximity that a friend of yours is with you no more. It has an effect on you that you'd never forget it. I still think about it often.